Listen closely, I will do this in their memory

In multiple Middle Eastern countries, after 14 years of school, children prepare for the most important year/ or two of their lives. These years might differ in terminology but their vitally remains the same.

Tawjihi/ General Secondary Education Certificate Examination [GSECE] in Jordan or Baccalaureate in Syria or simply the preparation year before going into university- present the most important step for students planning to enrol in university.

To qualify, students would have gone through two years of pre-school education, ten years of basic education and another two of secondary education leading to this extensive year.

Once enrolled in this hectic programme, they prepare for an extensive period of studying and long nights of memorising and schooling. They collectively aspire that this hard work qualifies them for the university of their dreams thus entering the profession they always aimed for.

This exam presents high pressure to student and their families due to the large number of subjects a student must succeed in and score high average in to pursue their next step. Once that is achieved, life opens its doors offering the job market with its new learning experiences.  

Regardless of the country, the pressure remains the same, Syria, Jordan, Egypt, etc… millions of students go through this path and hope to embark on the next steps.

These thoughts occupied Bana’s* mind while she was facing a lack of safety, and shelter and was mourning the death of her parents and her country.

Bana isn’t just another GSECE student, she is studying to the sound of bombs and wailing cries echoing across their tiny shelter. She kept trying to stay focused on studying but her mind kept gravitating towards tender memories of what once was. She held tighter onto her book as if the stronger she held, the more grounded she became.

However, it didn’t work. Her mind reluctantly travelled on its own escaping the rules of Arabic, sentence creation and paragraph formation and sought shelter in her mother’s warm embrace. The small pharmacy her mother and father used to work at, the bomb that targeted that small pharmacy stealing her parents away making her an orphan at the early at of 12. How she became displaced within her country searching for another place to shelter her and her two younger siblings. Memories hovered like a merciful cloud waiting to immerse her with its blessings, but it just didn’t happen. And glimpses of her mother and father greeting her home after arriving at school couldn’t seem more distant, their faces couldn’t feel more unfamiliar, and she felt like a foreigner to her family. Bana felt like an outsider to her family, did she alienate herself from her family to keep herself safe? Perhaps sane?

Suddenly, she felt the Arabic book slipping underneath her fingers and falling to the ground. She came to her senses and looked around to realise she was daydreaming. She’s at her grandmother who took her in after her parents passed away. Despite her uncle helping with financial expenses, Bana felt homeless in her new home and without a family. She’s grateful, she loves her grandmother. But is there any type of love that could ever replace a mother and a father’s love? With time, she realised the answer and learned to live with that feeling. She knew there was no overcoming that feeling, she could only live with it and make the best of her life and her family proud. But things are easier said than done. She tried to break her shell. But it's been five years of ruthless cycle. At the end of the day, Bana is still a child herself, no one expects her to carry this burden over her shoulders. So, she ended digging herself into this whole more and more each day.

While the uninvited hurricane was wreaking havoc across Bana’s mind, she was still doing her best to study and plan for her future. But she could only do so much. And her teacher noticed how isolated she became, her lifeless shadow began occupying Bana’s space in class. This concerned her teacher, she wasn’t engaging with her classmates nor participating eating herself away with each class and passing the night.

One day, Bana participated in a creative drawing class, the assignment was to draw a loved character of yours leading Bana to break her silence. The teacher immediately talked to her and Bana told her story. The teacher in turn spoke with the psychological support facilitator who offered her services to Bana ensuring she isn’t alone in this.

So, Bana participated in individual sessions to break through a cycle of isolation and built-up emotions. During these sessions, she confided in the facilitator and mentioned how difficult it was for her, “when my parents passed away, I lost any connection to life. I can never forget my mother’s last moments on earth when she went to see my father and none of them came back home”. She also enrolled in other group sessions to encourage her to engage with other friends and learn to trust others.

A while after, the time that betrayed Bana leading her to the darkest places, proved helpful to her. She began learning ways to handle these emotions, engaging with others thus claiming her older self. Her positive improvement was noticeable she even made new friends providing her with a sense of belonging- a feeling she was deprived of for so long.

These changes reflected positively on her academic satiation and she became excited to study and achieve her dreams. “I have a more positive outlook on life, and I want to pursue my education in memory of my parents. My biggest dream is to study English and enrol in Masters! And I want to see my siblings finish their studies as well,” she shares.

Children like Bana are able to have a profound look at life thanks to integrated education and psychological support like the one she enrolled in and 5,322 [2,661 benefitted from PSS and 2,661 from education] children. The project aims to support children with stationery and school bags for students and teachers along with ensuring increasing capacity for staff- teachers and psychosocial support facilitators as well as providing psychological support rooms and equipment ensuring a pathway for recovery.

*Name has been changed to protect identity.